New York Part Two: Pizza & Pleasure Things

Whooooooaaaa Nelly.. what the heck am I talking about? Well, you asked. I delivered. A post with actual pictures. I'm sorry to leave you all hanging! Haha.. I meant to do some last night, but I just got carried away at home, doing... nothing. I was resting!!! I am still in recovery from all the excitement, but I'll get there. It's amazing how now that I am older, it takes me twice as long to recover from events than before.. ohhhh the joys!
So.. you want to see a few things.. like the food I ate and what I wore right? Well, we'll start there!

What did I eat?

Saturday:
Dunkin Donuts. Bagel, egg, & cheese. Greasy. And disgustingly good. It was just one part of the grossly good food we had.. No picture! I ate it too quick!

Saturday Afternoon:
I ate half a chicken fajita wrap from some little deli across the street from the hotel. It was ok- the guy didn't warm it up- so blah. I ate chips and dip to make up for it.

Also consumed: A Magnolia cupcake, cupcake. At the Bleeker St fair that we stopped at during the SATC tour. It was delicious!

Later that night- we had pizza! This was the best pizza I've had in a LONG time. Maybe it's because I haven't had pizza in forever either.. and I was starved of pizza-ness..


The pieces were huge! But I still ate two of them. And two more at 3 am when we got home. Let's just say, I was busting out of my dress.. and it wasn't just because my boobies are big!

So my favorite part of the SATC tour was stopping at the Pleasure Chest. So I'm going to warn you, if you have a weak stomach, stop reading now! If you are like me and have the sense of humor as a 15 year old boy... get ready to laugh hysterically.



(we were not allowed to take pictures inside the store- but no matter- you see these and get the idea!)
Some sights that were seen inside the store.. a "c*m rag". It was a "dish towel" labeled as something one would use to clean oneself. We each bought one. LOL

Then there was the man inside the store the with the uber short shorts...................... he had a little something something hanging out...Sarah, Tanya, and I saw him.. we just about died! (Imagine forced whispers and shocked small gasps while elbowing each other and trying not to scream in horror.)

I saw loads of dildos, some that should not go ANYWHERE. One was the size of a NASA rocket. WHERE DOES THAT GO?????????!!!!!

Lots of ladies were buying things and I don't think they realized that they wouldn't be able to be inconspicuous about it either.. Because of the stores no return policy they need to make sure you know what you are buying.... so they take it out of the box, wave it around, tell you how to use it....

So we left, after touching and poking each other with almost everything. What can I say? We are like little boys. Ha!

We headed back to the hotel to get ready for the night.. The following pictures are pics I jacked off my friend. I hope you like!!!


Well those are just two of the pics.. I'll be back more tomorrow or Thursday with some more.. : ) I hope you liked them!!!!

Shocking, I Know

Happy Weekend! It was a hot day today over here in NE. I still haven't made it to the beach yet. I'm very upset about that one, I need to tan! I really shouldn't - I'm trying to stay out of the sun, but.. I can't help but love the sun!!!

Well Friday was uneventful. And I mean that. My Pilates workout that I penciled in, I got in at the end of the day. And that's ok by me! As long as it gets done at some point, it's all good! I did eat my weight in fruit salsa and pita chips that my mom made. I really love this!! My mom has outdone herself! Simple! Sweet! Delicious!

My mom made Jambalaya with shrimp and chicken as well for dinner and I helped myself to a nice plate of it. This was easy as well. GOYA (be still my beating heart..) RICE and shredded chicken and cut up shrimp. See? It's easy to cook ladies, even if you have no clue what to do!

My dessert was something that has been sitting in my freezer for a while now-


This was so yummy! A nice little dessert for the end of a hot night!
Saturday was a big day for us, me and Peanut had a lot to do! I started the day by doing a Hip Hop Abs Total Body Burn.. it burned my body, gave me a nice boost!
My breakfast to power up for the day.. yummy waffles with Raspberry preserves and Dark Chocolate Dreams PB. YUM!

Lunch was.... a salad, shocking, I know!

I tried a new dressing, Annie's Raspberry Vinaigrette- it was pretty darn good. I liked it! But... I hate to break it to you, but I ONLY had a salad because for my "real lunch" I was having one of these:

This is a caramel frappacino from Starbucks made with soy milk for an extra 50 cents. I LOVE these things, but I practically have to pawn my belongings to pay for one. But, it was my treat and was worth the trade off for "real food" for a change. And hey, it's the weekend!!
And here, my dears was my dinner! Barbecue chicken and apples sprinkled with brown sugar. I had two pieces of chicken.. it was so good! The skin was crispy and juicy at the same time and the flavor was awesome!

Well tomorrow, there is not much planned. Church, pool, pool, sun, pool, sun. I expect to get crispy and juicy like my chicken. You know, burnt and wet. From the pool!! God guys, what kind of a person do you think I am?! Anyway- have a fabulous rest of the weekend dears, I'll be blog reading soon, tomorrow night, tonight, I NEED to get my laundry done! I'm such a rockstar!!!

Get Your Green On

Yes, it is official. I have had a salad every day this week. Wow! To those who have followed my blog or know me personally, this is an acheivement! I have one packed for lunch for tomorrow too. I rarely eat salad, and here I am getting my green on for lunch every day. I'm patting myself on the back right now! I used the Newman's Own dressing today, but yesterday I made my own dressing using my nutrional yeast, lemon juice, and olive oil. It was pretty darn good! I'll have to tweak that!!

Anyway, workouts have been MUCH better because of the weather and I'm doing my yoga and my Hip Hop Abs. I have a Pilates workout penciled in for tomorrow morning and a walk planned for SURE at lunch time. I have my workout bag packed and everything!

Thanks for all the warm thoughts about my job too- I'm really hoping that something comes out of it.. I have to convince my managers there is room for me in that area. I found my niche, something they've been harassing me to find. So to keep me from going someplace else, they better hook me up!

Now onto the food for the day! This is what I brought for lunch, today and tomorrow. Yep. I'm predictable!


That is my famouso salad- a spring mix salad with green peppers on top. I ran out of tomatoes!
Also, carrots, waffles, and tuna for protein. And no, I didn't eat them all together! The waffles are breakfast! Haha.


My dinner for the night was soup and sweet potato fries. So good- although the soup was a little lacking- it did have enough substance for me.. but was still tasty. I'll take it!

I just had a piece of dark chocolate, so I am spent, tired, full, and satisfied. I am totally ready for bed now, even though it's only 9 p.m. I feel like I need to get to bed earlier and earlier every night to wake up at a decent hour. Anyone else feeling old lady-ish??

I hope you all have an awesome night! Good luck to my lady Katie on her big move today!! Stay safe doll!

101 Days Till..

Last night I was lying in bed wondering what my problem was. I have been hungry. And tired. And tired of being hungry and tired. Mood swings, stomach problems. Headaches and bodyaches. I've been stressed out about money, work, life, planning, not having any support from C's family, etc. It doesn't help that I've also been in a pollen induced coma lately due to the high pollen count around here. It's all overwhelming sometimes and I want to snap. Instead I usually just cry. Yesterday "prevening" I did and I thought there might be some solace in my yoga mat. I did an hour and a half of yoga and damn did it feel GREAT. I loved every second of it. It reminded me of my old runner's high.. I've been having a lot of pain in my foot, so running is out- even though it's still ok to bike ride so far.. so biking is my only form of cardio lately... When I was done I was starving. Yoga burns mucho calories for me I think!
So anyway- while I was reaching deep into myself (my soul people... GOD YOU GUYS ARE GROSS!) I thought about how I should do a yoga challange- maybe that will distract my mind if I have a place to go for 30 minutes everyday where I can focus on not what is going wrong, but what my body is doing right. I'm not tooting my own horn here but I can go into some pretty freaky yoga poses just from being uber flexible in my hips. Oh man I miss my hubby... (sorry now I'm being gross)
Then I read Biz's blog today (by the way- nice new layout Biz!) and she started a 101 Days of Summer Challange. I missed the start date so technically I am going for 99 days of Summer... but Biz signed me up anyway!!!

My challenge to myself:
1. Eat more healthy fats.
- I don't count calories, but I'm not stupid. I'm not eating enough fat. Maybe that's why I've been such a bum lately.

2. Do at least 30 minutes of yoga daily.
- this may change as my body protests so much stretching. But I'm open to a couple of days of Pilates in exchange for yoga.

3. Biking 15 miles a week
- I don't know how I will keep track of mileage but I have a general idea of how far I can go based on my previous running routes.

Please note. I AM NOT trying to lose ANY more weight. I don't want to say what my weight is right now as that might trigger some people. Every body is different and carries their weight in different places. Right now, every pound I have is in my butt and my boobs. So if I have new readers coming over from different places, please don't ask what I weigh, I won't share!! *hugs*

What does this mean for the blog? I gotta start posting everyday.. FKGLODSL>A>A WHA?!!!
I knew you'd all be shocked! Even if it's just a little blip and there are no pictures. No humor. No jokes. No food. I'm gonna flippin' post everyday. If I happen to have an online stalker who reads everyday.. if I miss one, make sure you smack me.


I will try to have a little ditty on food and such that I'm eating, but I can't make any promises that some of my posts will be beyond.. "FML- I did my yoga. Now beat it." HAHA.

Here is my little badge to make it official.. Now I'm IN!

TODAY- I already did my yoga ; ) this morning, bright and early.. It was nice to go back to the mat after just doing a bunch of yoga last night.

FOOD: Using my leftover chicken, and throwing together many things I had hanging around my freezer, I managed to come up with a MEAL. *GASP!!!!!* I know you are all shocked! It's so easy! Even all you peeps who have commented and said you are terrible cooks, this was so terribly easy. Toss frozen veggies in a pan. Heat. Toss in sauce. Heat some more. Toss in grilled chicken. Heat some more and WhAMO.. we have a meal!


Here is what went into it... Some nice Gluten-free teriyaki sauce... It smelled
SO good! I loved it!


I should have thought of this the other day when everyone was eating Chinese and I was picking at rice and an egg roll!

Well thats all I got for you guys! I better get back to work over here. My phone call time is UP- time to work on EMAILS. BAHHHH!

Wonder

Memorial Day weekend is a brief memory for me. It seems so far away, even though it was only just the other day. Anyone else have time feel like it's flying by but it's moving at a snail's pace? I suppose.. since it's already Hump Day - the week is half over and I shouldn't be complaining! But I realized that I never posted anyrthing from Mem Weekend.. how can I ditch you like that?! Crazy me!

So for starters, I worked on Monday.. What? That's un-American isn't it??? But it was for a good cause- I was making the OT. I realize that I don't talk about money very often- but I'm wayyyy struggling. So that one day of working, paid for one week of camp for the Peanut. And I will gladly give up a nice holiday if it means she gets a week of learning and fun and excitement. And it was NICE outside! I couldn't believe it!

Let's run down the schedule here.. Friday was the 28th- the 27th was my parents 33rd anniversary. Holy crap! And they are still going strong- even though they drive each other crazy. Well anyway, my grandmother ordered Chinese food for us.. naturally, not asking anyone what they wanted besides my father- who wants IT ALL! So nothing came that I could eat, so I picked at the rice, ate an egg roll and called it a day. My grandmother got upset- but hey- what can you do?

Saturday, I got up early and worked out.. then the Peanut and I went for a long bike ride- it was nice to get out in the bright morning sunshine. She is doing great at bike riding now- trying to do tricks and all that. Meanwhile, I'm behind her screaming STOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!! OMG WHAT ARE YOU CRAZYYYYYY!!!?!??!! Mama can't afford no ER trips!!! This kid is going to have to be in a BUBBLE till she's 18! Mild stroke over and done with and we went shopping!
She needed a bathing suit, new dresses for church, and new shorts. Oh and new sneakers. Got all that and went food shopping. My favorite part of the day! We stocked up on Larabars, fruits and veggies (I buy frozen veggies cuz I'm LAZY) and some new snackies to supplement the cans of tuna and big container of yogurt I have. Here are some of the goods...
(this I am dying to try!!!! I need to find some ground turkey in my freezer- all you do is add salsa, and ground meat.. and DONE! Hamburger Helper.. but GF and DF style.. Yay!!!!!)

I picked this up cuz it was on sale.. I'm not sure I'll like it because blueberries do awful things to my stomach. I'm hoping because they are not fresh I'll be ok! It just looks SO YUMMMMY!

I thought of Sarah when I saw these.. This is nut free.. and tastes yum.. It's a little on the sweet side- so I would use it in plain yogurt- I put mine in vanilla and it was a bit TOO sweet. Still- nutrition wise- this was on par..

I can't wait to try these either. What should I put on them? A veggie burger? A huge juciy hamburger? Chicken????

I think that's about it.. So let's go over to Sunday! Another celebration for my parent's anniversary! We had a cookout and had all the cousin's and siblings over. It was a fun little gathering.. tons of food to be found. Here was my plate..

I was carbo-loading.. we have chicken, beans, and Goya Mexican rice. Gotta love it! Also consumed were some chips, and lots of pink lemonade. No dessert, because the Peanut and I were on our way to a birthday party for Melo.
I won't even get into what happened at the party. Let's go with the good stuff. Or semi-good stuff.

Note to parents.... Bouncy house + 90 degree weather + 20 kids does not = FUN. It was cool for about 5 minutes. But I got some good pictures!
Lissette on the bouncy house- she had wayy too much fun!
Birthday boy. He is crabby cuz he is wearing a Yankee shirt- GO SOX! Nani- one of my nieces, she is too cute!

Well that is about it! Hope everyone is having an AWESOME week!!!!! I'll be blog reading so look for my comments... ; )

Say Ahhh...

Is it Tuesday? Really? Have I really been gone that long? Sweet niblets!!
Well, I am back, it's been a LONG week already and it's only 8:48 in the morning (well it was when I started writing this anyway!)

I don't have too much in terms of words to say. But my nephew Melo turned 1. I love him so much I feel like I birthed him sometimes- and he doesn't seem to mind that I act like that either! I'm always getting hugs and kisses from him - what a flirt!!!! So here are the pics from our little cake-cutting ceremony on Sunday - his actual party is in two weeks, more on that in a second.


Here is he is eating the ice cream cake...adorable isn't he??


It was a good day with all the kids, I wish I took more pics! I have to save some of my memory though for this weekend when I have 6 children at my house for 4 days. Please, someone ask me WHY, HOW, WHAT. WHY did I say yes? HOW did they convince me to say yes? WHAT was I on when I said yes?
I'm weak when it comes to the kids! My SIL asked if I would babysit for her cherubs (qty 3) this weekend so she can go to Vegas (ummmm no invite??). I said ok for a three day weekend- how long can one stay in Vegas and stay sober and wealthy? Then it suddenly turned into a five day trip and I had to take three days off work for it! Yikes! So then, my niece (qty 1) and my BIL's younger kids (qty 2) want to come as well. If anyone is looking for me... I'll be the one with the mangy hair, sweatpants, with the crazed look on her face. Yep. For sure! I'm hoping the weather is nice, we will just walk around the neighborhood and go to the park and play outside. Please.. pray for sunshine!
So what was on muy food menu for the weekend? I have to get back to work over here, so I'll just put up the pics, you can bask in my food glory for now.. more later this week, if I haven't killed myself..
This pizza was pretty good- nutrition facts a little daunting but I sucked it up and ate the whole thing..


My go-to snack!



Chicken nuggets and fries! Don't worry, they were the good kind, no MSG or HFCS here ;)


And the best GF-DF french toast.. ever!!!!! I love this stuff! Highly recommended!

Well- I'm back off to work- I'll be trying to get caught up on blogs today- sneaking them between emails, so don't be surprised if you see a comment from me today!!!

It's Far From Over

I just started and restarted this post about a million times. I can't think of words to say that will rightfully express what I'm feeling right now. I don't think there are any words to describe it. It's a mixture of relief, sadness, happiness, compassion, joy, and finally, a little peace.

Everyday it's a different struggle for me.

Everyday it's a different reason to feel down. To be angry with myself over something stupid.

But everyday I want to smack myself and say, "what the hell is the matter with you???"

Then I remember that there IS something the matter with me. And I can't fix it by myself. It can't be fixed with a pasta dinner. Or a pedicure. Or a book. Or repeating little mantras to myself. This is a deep seeded belief that I don't deserve what I have. That I don't deserve to be happy. Or thin. Or beautiful. Because what I see in the mirror is a reflection of what I think is inside. And that view is a distorted, freakish thing.

I remember meeting Charlie's ex for the first time two years ago, she is tall, thin, hair is gorgeous, skin is perfect. Her make-up was perfectly applied and her clothes trendy, new, and expensive. I literally almost passed out. Here I was, in sweat pants and a tshirt. I had showered but a ponytail held my hair back and I had minimal make-up on. I'll be honest, I was going to visit Charlie after he got arrested- so who the hell was I trying to impress? And WHO was she trying to impress?

She said, "who the fuck does she think she is? Look at her! I'm beautiful and she's fuckin' ugly. Why the fuck do you want her?"

I said nothing in reply, my face must have turned purple in shame. I thought Charlie was going to slap her though. From then on in, I was the ugly white bitch to her. And to me, I never forget words. Words are things you can never take back, even when said in a moment of anger. Charlie defended me, and has everytime she brings that day up to him- he thinks I'm beautiful. He thinks even though she's pretty to everyone else, she is ugly on the inside and I'm perfect. He is proud of me, because I'm everything she isn't. I work, I pay my bills, I'm a good mom, I have a perfect body (his words obviously), and best of all, I treat him like gold. He calls the 6 years he was living with her a prison sentence. But I remember that moment bringing back in the fear that I am not good enough. Why would he want me instead of her? I try to remember who she really is. And it works for the moment. I still get angry when I hear that he talked to her, mainly because, even after all this time, she still thinks I stole her man. Um hello wacko! NO! I'd just like to point out that C and this crazy biz-natch were broken up for 3 years when I met him!

Where am I going with all this stuff anyway? Oh yea. I really believe that one of the issues I have is not about my body. It's the reflection of how I feel about the inside of myself- coming out. It's that I'm not "enough". Enough what? Smart enough, friendly enough, good enough, popular enough, pretty enough. And when I feel not enough I turn to the only thing that makes sense to me. Beat up the vessel that carries all these human emotions, tendencies, and weaknesses around. Which is what I find alot of us do. Agree? The hardest thing to do is to believe how strong and beautiful we really are.
Wow, I can't believe I wrote that much.. I didn't mean to get so deep for a day after hump-day. I'll be working on self-reflection and learning to recognize what I am feeling and if I'm feeling that way because of some other emotion. Like am I saying I'm fat because I'm feeling sad about my friends not calling me... ever? Good plan no? Cognitive behavior therapy right here kids!!!!!!!! Change the way you think!

So I promised you food didn't I? I did.. Dinner.. and more dinner. Along with Shaun T, the sexy guy from Hip Hop Abs for dessert.


Here we have Van's gluten-free waffles with Almond Butter and Raspberry jelly. I stole three apple slices from the Peanut's plate.. haha. A smaller dinner because I had a huge lunch and a huge dinner on Tuesday night. I did end up making the rice and sausage mix. I used Al Fresco chicken sausage... holy deliciousness in a sausge and no I'm not talkin' about a man!!!!!


(my sense of humor is obviously still intact...)
Here is Shaun T up on my big screen TV. Look he's trying to give you a hug!!!!!!
I really think he's a little on the gay side, but he can be gay all he wants, as long as he's straight for me!!!!!!!!

Big plans this weekend. It's going to be sunny sunny and sunny. Tan. Tan. Tan. I need a tan! I will be bike riding. I will be running around like a mad-dog. And hopefully, heading out someplace with the Peanut. My goal is to go to Five Guys & A Burger with her, but I'm not sure that will end up happening.. maybe just for some frozen yogurt or something small like that. Let's not push it with burgers and fries!
If you are still reading after all this blabber, thank you, for your heartfelt words of support. They mean more to me than you will ever ever know. We are all in this together right?? *cue High School Musical soundtrack*. You guys rock my socks. :)

Easter And Exhaustion

Hello dear ones.. it's Tuesday and I seemed to have missed my usual Saturday and Monday post. I am so sorry! I've been a little "unplugged" from the world lately. I'm just really tired all of a sudden! Bed time is creeping in earlier and earlier- which might not be a bad thing! But who knows why...

So Easter weekend you say? What did we do? Well, alot happened! First of all on Saturday, the Peanut got to go to the zoo with her Aunties and my nephew Caiden! Lucky!!!! She had a blast and didn't come home until about 8 that night. Party ANIMAL! What did I do while she was gone? I went to a salsa workshop with my dance class in Cranston. As you remember last week we had the "Historic Flooding" here in Rhode Island and the dance studio we went to was literally a stone's throw away from the Pawtuxet river. Brilliant! I got a couple of good pics of the roaring river.. Still going strong!


This place caught my eye though... soft serve!!!!! Yummy!

The class was absolutely AMAZING! Well worth the extra money to go and spend a beautiful afternoon inside for! I loved it and learned A LOT! I also appreciated how confident my dance teacher is in my dance skills- I'm only in the second level for dance class now and when it came time to split up into "beginner/intermediate" (my level) and "intermediate/advanced" (ummmm not me!) he made me go into the advanced class. Ego boost! It was a little harder, but I worked my tail off and did it. Good stuff you know?
So I don't know if you guys may know, but the last couple of weeks have been rough food-wise for me. I've had to talk myself into eating a lot of times and working out like a looney some days. Not cool. I'm a work in progress though I think and some days are better than others. Well anyway- I considered Saturday after class a success because I managed to talk myself INTO (and not out of) having soft serve frozen yogurt. With chocolate sprinkles. All while day-dreaming by the Pawtuxet. It is a small success, but because I can't remember the last time I let myself indulge like that- it's a good one. Baby steps my friends.. I told my C about it, who said I needed to have six more. He thinks I'm too skinny.. lol

So Easter came and so did the Easter bunny! I forgot to take a picture of what he brought the Peanut, but he brought me Starburst jelly beans! I love those things! Oh "Easter bunny" knows me so well!
But here we are in all our fancy dolled up glory! (please ignore my extreme whiteness- mama needs to lay out!!!)

It was the usual routine for Easter- church, food, egg hunt.. and nap time!
I made a lovely lovely dish that I borrowed from Christina (thanks girl!)- a polenta lasagna. I made mine with ground chicken, polenta rounds, Muir Glen marinara sauce, and "rice mozzarella cheese". I sprinkled nutritional yeast over the top of it and baked away. This is pretty simple to make I gotta tell ya! On Saturday I sauteed the polenta rounds and browned the chicken and set it aside. Then on Sunday I layered the ingredients. And baked it. Wow. So intensely hard!!!! Ha!
Here is a picture of it uncooked. I forgot to take a picture of it cooked!

EVERYONE loved it! I was as surprised as my mother was! I think the key thing was, I didn't mention the fact that the cheese was not "real" cheese. :) No one noticed. Shhhhhhh!!!! I thought it was amazing! The "cheese" melted like it was supposed to and did not taste fake at all. GOOD DEAL! Adding this one to my permanent recipe book in my head!
I did have to buy that cheese at Whole Foods though (argh- so expensive!) I also bought some Amazing Grass products to try at the same time.. only becuase I came across a blog post of Christina's (girl I blogger-creeped you this weekend..) where she mentions that Amazing Grass has all but rid her of chronic headaches. If you know me, I always have a freakin' head ache. So I got some to sample see if I liked it enough to buy it on a regular basis.


I tried this bar yesterday afternoon. Despite its questionable looks and odd taste at times, it was quite delicious. And the best part was it kept me full for hours- which is completely weird. I eat like a cat- only a little bit at a time and I eat something almost every couple of hours. I think my metabolism is all out of whack though because no matter what kind of meal I eat, I'm hungry again three hours later- whether it's a huge burger and fries or it's a yogurt sprinkled with granola. Strange! But anyway- although the taste was a bit weird for me- I kinda liked it! It wasn't too bad! I have some of the chocolate "amazing meal" stuff so I'll give that a whirl sometime this week as well.

Well anyway, I have to get back to work. You know, so I can do. Work. *gasp*

I'll be catching up on your blogs soooooooooon. Tomorrow night probably- I have dance class TONIGHT! Whoooooo!