Friday, June 11, 2010

The Battle

Well it's FINALLY FRIDAY!!!!! I can't believe it, I'm SO happy for the weekend you guys have no idea! Well you might.. It's a double good time.. pay day and the weekend. I'm always happy on those days!

So today is the Peanut's LAST DAY of 2nd grade! I can't believe it! She's getting so big!!!! No seriously she is, I'm convinced she is already a full head taller than I was at that age!

So what to do.. what to do.. I am planning on taking her out tonight for dinner. Someplace cheap and quick and easy. My options are as follows: Red Robin, Five Guys and a Burger, Friendly's, or Picadilly Pub, or IHop. I don't want to go to "the Pic". It's definitely a townie spot, complete with crazy waitresses and too expensive for what you get food. Red Robin seems like a good idea. Since Monday I've been dreaming about a big huge burger for some reason. I won't share what else I dreamed about though.. it's too crazy!

This morning though, when I got my lazy butt up to workout- I reached for my Pilates DVD and instead ended up with Hip Hop Abs. A way, I suppose to burn a lot of calories in preparation for the burger tonight.

The whole time I was working out, my thoughts were consumed with ED thoughts. Move faster, don't rest in between sets.. Then at work, I sat here thinking to myself.. "how the hell am I going to be able to do this tonight? What was I thinking?". I haven't been out to eat in the longest time it seems like. I struggled with a nutrition calculator on the Red Robin website trying to get ONE of the burgers down to under 600 calories (when my starting point was 1200, I'd say, I'm on the right track!). But how do I not screw this up? How do I not panic in the middle of the restaurant and scare the Peanut? Should I put aside my craving and just get something I know I'd feel more comfortable eating like soup and salad? Wait, I hate salad. Soup and.... soup. It's like, I want a freakin burger, so why can't I just put aside my fears and just go for it???
Who else has had this happen? And what have you done if anything about it?
I did however, have a salmon burger last night. But it was in fear food rage when I first thought about taking the Peanut out to dinner. Maybe if I have this, it will quiet the urge to eat a burger...

No, try again. This is not going well today...

I'll let you know how I make out tomorrow..


  1. Ohh I love Red Robin! I can't eat a whole burger there anyways. So even if you did get it down to 600, you might only eat 300-400 calories of it, right? And besides a 600 calorie meal isn't that bad, esp a big burger out!

    I've been moving a lot more since joining this challenge and last night I craved something I rarely want - carbs. I never ever buy potatoes, we rarely have bread on hand, and we eat pasta maybe once a month. I'm just not a carb person! But last night I ate a 2 person size portion of full-fat fettucine alfredo and like an 8" hoagie from a take-out place. Listen to your body and its cravings!! For me if I stop and think about it, it seems like a bad decision, but you know what? It's ONE MEAL.

    And the same would be for your burger. You and I NEVER eat like that. If we started eating like that everyday -- then, yeah, we've got a problem and those thoughts need to enter our heads. But to have one meal like that out of the blue barely ever is not gonna hurt us. You have to look at it that way - b/c that's the healthy way.

    Try to think of it the same as alcohol. Yes, wine, beer, cocktails are a lot of calories. But when you're out and having fun you can splurge a bit, it's fine and it won't make a big difference. The problem is if you become an alcoholic and can't control your drinking to the piont of being unhealthy. The same goes for "splurges" of food - once in awhile is fine as long as you go back to healthy. It's when you continue down that path it becomes unhealthy.

  2. Girl I love ya! Congrats to Peanut for graduating second grade! Anthony's last day is next Friday! TIme flies! Yay for SUMMER!!!!

    I love IHOP! Cant wait to see where you and peanut choose to go!

    LOVE LISTEN TO ME FOR A SECOND!! U do not have to WORRY about eating a burger and fries tonight at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Live it up! U eat healthy pretty much from what I see all the time, and a burger here and there is not going to kill you! Now if you were getting Mcdonalds everyday I would be worried for you!!!!!!! That would not be good for you! SO go out with peanut and get whatever you want tonight, love u!!!!!!

  3. i totally agree! if u have a craving and totally ignore it, you will just end up eating a lot of other random stuff that you dont even want, you know?

    congrats to peanut! just have a great time wherever you go/whatever you do!

  4. I have this struggle all the time and it's like no matter what I try to do,I can't just eat what I want when I go out--I end up with a salad no matter what. So I don't have any advise but HATE when this happens. I totally know how you're feeling.

    I've been thinking about you a lot.


  5. My baby just finished up 2nd grade too! Exciting!

    Have the burger. If you stay within good calorie range for a couple of weeks, it's actually somewhat "good" for your body to take in extra calories one day. Not thousands but if you end up eating 2000 calories one day out of 2 - 3 weeks, it's fine. Lets say you eat 1400 calories a day, your body gets used to the 1400 calories and it predicts that it will have to work to burn 1400 calories. If you throw it a curve ball every once in awhile (not too often mind you), then you kick it into high gear and it started to burn the extra calories and kinda prepares for the extra calories the next day. Only, the next day, you will only give your body your 1400 calories but it's WORKING HARDER. This is the super simplified explanation of this but moral of the story, have the burger, throw your body into a curve ball for the one day and then get right back on track.

  6. Good for you for going out anyway. I know it can be hard. After I found out I got the job I was going for, Andy and I ordered Indian takeway. That can sometimes be hard for me and I never eat enough of it but it was good and then we had some still left over for lunch today. I guess I'm lucky as I have started to come to acceptance with my body and the ED, so I am finally not restricting and I'm not weighing hardly as much and even better, I'm not thinking about it. I am also eating more and I've noticed that when I do weigh, once a week, I have stopped fluctuating and am maintaining the same weight. It is higher a bit than I would have been able to deal with 2 months ago, but I am actually really happy now. Finally!

  7. Congrats to the Peanut for finishing second grade!

    I think the best thing you can do for yourself is to honor your body and your cravings and eat the burger. Honestly, one burger is not going to kill you, and if you just have a bowl of soup you will leave the restaurant feeling unsatisfied.

    Oops, I just realized I'm kind of late with this already had the dinner...anyway, for future reference, I think it is best to listen to your cravings. Having a burger once in a while won't kill you, it won't make you gain weight, and if you have such a mental hangup about it then it might even make you a bit stronger. It just shows you that food is simply food, and there is so much more to life.
    I hope you were able to just enjoy the night with your daughter, since that is what it's all about anyway, right?

  8. I hope you had good luck with your burger!
    I'm kinda jealous you can even consider eating one to be quite honest :/ I hope you enjoyed every bite and didn't get anxiety once :)